The Art of Persuasion

I have been thinking about how to influence people who don’t have to listen to me. SO not a problem for a team in a business led by a powerful figure but for certain cross departmental groups in a large firm, or for ad hoc groups in society, more of a concern. I live in a lovely old building where I rent a super flat and where there are seven other apartments; in total, four large like mine and four smaller. Three owners [all in the same family] have three of the four largest apartments but these people do not live in their own apartments which are inherited family wealth. The building is administered only by the owners, wherever they live. Two non-family owners actually live in the building while a third large apartment has been sold with the owner yet to move in. These three owners have bought their properties on the open market.

I have recently been unsettled by the renting of the next-door apartment to a firm, and not to a person. It would be lovely to have a neighbour but the fleeting occupants, often overnight, are unknown to, and unseen normally by, me though I noted different cars in the relevant parking space next door. What I DO notice is that often messy boots have emerged outside my door from the adjacent lift. Somehow, this chiefly unseen, always unheard, cavalcade has disturbed me, perhaps by its

transience, perhaps by the slight mess on the carpet outside my door, perhaps by the idea of unknowns passing through. I am so not a nervous person but I think I have felt slighted by the discourtesy of not being informed by the owners of the situation, and by the impossibility for me of making contact. Ships that pass in the night do nothing to add to the feeling of the common good, so important to the health and well-being of life in a shared building.

For the first time in five years of happy residence here I have felt, therefore, moved to Do Something and I wrote a letter to all owners and renters before the annual owners’ meeting recently outlining my discomfort and pointing out several other things which needed action, such as more frequent cleaning of the public areas; thorough and lasting repair of the doors to the adjacent car park to prevent illegal parking and improve security. I had thought that my letter was judicious, to the point, politely explicit and I included remarks on the responsibility of owners to consider the notion of the common good which I feel is in part, at least, their responsibility and an important one. A happy atmosphere makes for happy residents.

At the owners’ meeting, consensus was reached on

Influencing others.

the cleaning but on nothing else apparently except that the adjacent flat rental has now stopped, for the time being at least. This of course was not decided at or by the meeting and may have had nothing at all to do with my letter. But this is the one really important plus for me and was the irritant which prompted my letter. An unexpected tiny sting in the tail is the vote carried to disallow anyone without a car parking space next-door, having occasional parking for their visitors in unoccupied spaces. This has been allowed for my visitors-with-cars for the last five years and happens only rarely. Most of my guests come by Eurostar. However, this restriction addresses no existing problem, adds little to the notion of the common good and does prompt the slight suspicion that those with the power, have used the time-honoured method of problem-solving: that of shooting the messenger!!

And clearly, I need to think again of how to influence people who do not want, or need, to listen to me! I enjoyed some modest success in the art of persuasion when I led a staff of around 65 people and 1100 adolescents but that was a long time ago and we were involved in, broadly, a shared endeavour.

 Tulips from Daniel, a young resident here.